Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a curious thing.  It's not really an option.  Unforgiveness will kill everything good in our world.  It brings in fear and bitterness which methodically destroy our relationships and our bodies by our own permission.  And yet.  And yet.

I think one deterrent to forgiveness is the feeling that the despicable acts of the other will not get their due.  Another is the feeling that as long as the behaviors of others are not dealt with they will continue and our lives cannot progress in good.  Yet just the opposite is true.  God has promised by his character that evil will be avenged.  It is either avenged by the blood of Christ applied or it is avenged by the wrath of a Holy God.  
"Vengeance is mine.  I will repay," says the Lord.  Yet because judgment is not executed speedily, men's hearts are set to do evil.  You will be forgiven as you forgive others.  He who is forgiven much, loves much.  God's written word has much to say about the subjects of vengeance and forgiveness.  Forgiveness requires faith in God's ability to deal with evil -their evil; our evil.  Vengeance requires faith in God's ability to have grace for our evil but not for another's evil.
I have heard people say that if it still hurts you, you have not forgiven.  I do not believe that for one second.  Some things will always hurt.  You have a choice when you feel the pain.  You may forgive again and sink your heart and hopes back into your God.  Or you can twist the knife in your gut and begin the bitter vengeance again.
It is true that God can take all those things that were evil and meant for evil and reroute them to produce good in the lives of those who love him and recognize the call he has on their lives.  Wounds can become purposeful then.  But what is bound on earth by God's chosen ones is bound in heaven.  Sometimes we tie up the blessings that could come with our faith by our unforgiveness.  We feel the pain and we lose hope in the 'all things'.  Yet the promise is true and does not depend on our own strength of will or character.  It depends on the strength of our God's will and character.  He has determined.  He will do it.  I'd rather he got my attention by speaking to me than by altering the course of my life.  And yet.  And yet.
Nothing will fail of the promises of God.  Years ago I committed myself to his care and will.  It has been a long road. At times it has been a hard road but the hard times have proved his promises were good and active more often than the smooth smiley road.
And so one more day, I choose to forgive.  It does not absolve the guilty but it allows grace to flow.  It does not stop the pain but it does give purpose to it.  It recognizes that I had much to be forgiven of.  It reminds me that I am forgiven.  But what if evil continues?  What if the perpetrator is not dealt with?  What if I don't get what I want?  What if we are not restored?  Tomorrow, I will choose to forgive, for my Father in heaven will be there holding me, loving me, saving me, forgiving me, changing me, healing me.
Forgiveness is not really an option it is the only course that leads to life and God has promised me life.