And One Who Didn't

John chapter 18 points out the enormous differences in 3 of the men Jesus chose as followers.

     John was a man full of feeling and expression.  He didn’t refer to himself as John but as one of the disciples.  ‘The other disciple,’  ‘another disciple,’  ‘the disciple that Jesus loved.’  He tells it all in such a way that the reader  always knows who that other disciple is. This is the first time it has occurred to me that John was affected by Judas in a great way.  I saw it in a few other places and knowing that John wrote this several years later is a testament to how deeply the defecting of Judas affected John.  Here he refers to him as ‘Judas the traitor’.  Though a fisherman by trade, John was a respected gentleman.  He knew the high priest and was allowed in when Jesus was taken.  He got permission to bring Peter inside as well.  His mother was convinced that he had been groomed sufficiently to become a public servant in the new order she expected the ‘Christ’ to establish.  He was the disciple at the cross during the death of Jesus.  Jesus charged him with the care of his mother, transferring his responsibility as the first born.  In all the accounts, John is constantly at Jesus side throughout his ministry.

     Judas, who betrayed him, knew the place, because Jesus had often met there with his disciples. (Verse 2)  Judas was one of the 12 and, though Jesus understood from the beginning that he was created and called to the purpose of betrayal, it is apparent in all of the accounts that Jesus had never singled him out before that night.  Even in the places where it is obvious that Judas did not have the right motive or spirit, he is never fingered until that night.  In John’s account, written many years later, he sees Judas for what he was and he reveals him as such periodically, but Jesus did not point it out during his ministry.  Judas, whether by default, appointment or vote, ended up as the treasurer of the group.  He was considered shrewd by the others, though it is pointed out by John that he often took from the bag for himself.  But, he was treated, and respected, in all manner, as one of the 12 closest followers of Jesus.

     Peter is perhaps the biggest question among the disciples.  I’ve often thought that had I been on earth and had to pick one of the 12 to betray Jesus, I probably would have picked Peter.  He was so changeable.  He was hotheaded and opinionated.   He ran off at the mouth when he should have been silent.  Jesus himself called him ‘Satan’ once.  And he did deny even knowing Jesus on the night he was crucified.  I see Peter as a rough, coarse man.  He probably had a sense of humor that had to be dragged into submission frequently.  He attacked one of the guards that night at the garden.  He cursed and denied.  And he was the first to decide to go on with his life as a fisherman after the crucifixion.  Yet Peter would become the strongest of leaders and the truest of followers.  He would forge a legacy in the church through wisdom and miraculous works that would elevate him to the highest respect and yet he would deny that respect by asking to be crucified upside down so as not to dishonor the death of Jesus.

     Though there were nine others, these three men are mentioned in this chapter as being with Jesus that night.  John and Peter waited while Jesus prayed; Judas betrayed Jesus, bringing outsiders into their special place of refuge to lead him to his destiny.  John went in with Jesus, publicly claiming association with him.  Peter tried to defend him and yet denied that he was even an acquaintance until he heard the rooster crow.  Other accounts tell us he ran out and cried in agony.  Judas, according to other accounts, tried to back out of his role and then committed suicide.  Yet they all played their role destined from their birth but chosen in the scope of time.

Jesus asked the guards -these invaders in his private time- “What do you want?  Who are you looking for?”  And when they answered “Jesus of Nazareth,” he replied “I am he” as the traitor stood by.

     The guards brandishing swords and clubs and carrying torches stumbled backward at his words and fell down.  Oh the power of prayer and obedience!

     In verse 8, Jesus answered. “If you are looking for me, then let these men go.”  This happened so that the words he had spoken would be fulfilled: “I have not lost one of those you gave me.”

     It would appear Peter tested that by grabbing a sword and cutting off the ear of a guard, an incident that would play out later when a relative of the man whose ear Peter had cut off, challenged him, “Didn’t I see you with him in the olive grove?” Again Peter denied it, and at that moment a rooster began to crow. (Verses 26 and 27)

Jesus commanded Peter, “Put your sword away! Shall I not drink the cup the Father has given me?” (Verse 11)

In John chapter 6 Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry, and whoever believes in me will never be thirsty.   But as I told you, you have seen me and still you do not believe.  All those the Father gives me will come to me, and whoever comes to me I will never drive away.  For I have come down from heaven not to do my will but to do the will of him who sent me.  And this is the will of him who sent me, that I shall lose none of all those he has given me, but raise them up at the last day.  For my Father’s will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

     And so we are back to the matter of faith and obedience.  Peter, for all his failure, believed and in time repented and obeyed.  Judas for all his seeing and all the trust given him did not believe, could not obey.  John identified himself as the one Jesus loved, as that other disciple, full of faith and obedience even in the time of death.  Jesus knew who followed him in faith.  He chose one who didn’t.

It has brought much consideration to my mind and heart.