If I were a rich . . er . . . woman

I have seen two or three documentaries and once even a short lived reality show about people who win the lottery or sweepstakes and the effects it has on their lives.  I’ve never really seen a good effect.  Yet, I must admit that all those stories had one thing in common.  A poor man or woman with no money management skills and great financial need won the ‘big one.’  Within a year in most cases, the person’s life was destroyed, he had as little or less than before and was much worse off because most of his family and friends had become his enemies.  One man I saw still had a stipend from it, but wouldn’t let the interviewer show his face or location.  He had to move away from his former home for his own physical and mental safety.  He was sad and frustrated by the way it turned out.

Many of those people were trying to sell the fancy ‘toys’ they bought to pay the bills generated from such.  They were clinging to the most ridiculous relics from their spending binge.  Eyes hollow, they faced their former conditions, but without the innocence and hope that they had before and often without friends and family.

As a young mother, most days I had barely enough to go around for each day.  My family did not go hungry, but life was hard and more than once I was humbled by the lack around me.  Yet, I was never one to live in a mental state of lack.  I made do and I found ways to get by.  I sewed; I painted; I taught private music lessons.  For a time I was hired on to teach art in a non accredited program from a good university.  Granted, I never turned it into a fortune and it required skill to stretch what I had to even be adequate.  But I made it happen and there was always enough –barely enough- but enough.

Yet I can remember hearing the tales of people who won those large amounts from sweeps and lotteries and thinking “If only I could win….”  How would it have changed my life and the life of my family?  One of my favorite musicals is “Fiddler on the Roof.”  And of course one of my favorite moments is when Tevea sings “If I were a rich man…”  The song strikes a chord, for who hasn’t dreamed of being free to have, free to go, free to help? 

My father always said “Life is a series of trades.  You trade your day, your energy, your ability, your life force for money which you then trade for food, clothing, entertainment, transportation.”  He always told me that money has no value except what it can be traded for.  He was solvent.  He did much good with his money.  He had what he needed for a life of adventure, love, dreams and joy.  He kept a portion, saved for the unexpected and he gave a good amount away.  To me, he was the ‘rich man’ everyone admired, yet by many standards he was not overly successful. 

My grandfather was a gentleman farmer.  He owned a huge herd of registered cattle, his own machinery, grew his own cattle feed and paid cash for everything he bought including the machinery and new cars.  Yet to know him, he was a simple man who worked hard and lived without finery.  His motto was learn what you need to know, work hard, plan well and wait as long as it takes.

I have asked myself how receiving a huge amount of money all at one time would change my life.  How would it change the relationships I have?  Would it destroy me?  When you ease into wealth, or fight your way in as some would say, you have opportunity to adjust to the having.  Those around you learn to adjust to your wealth as well.  They accept your right to give or not give them what they want.  I think one reason is that slowly acquired wealth changes your surroundings slowly.  It changes your circle of friends and acquaintances.

But wealth gained quickly seems to spur demands from other people.  If you walked into a windfall, why shouldn’t they.  If you didn’t go through the process of learn, plan, work and wait, why should they have to?  I think of Alfie P Doolittle saying “I touched everybody I knew, now everybody touches me.”  And “No. A fiver will be plenty, more than that and it makes you feel responsible.”  In the movie it makes us laugh.  In life, not so much.

So what if I gained a fortune over night?  I can say it would not change my life much, I’ve always thought I would just go on working and living simply, but would I?  We live a comfortable life in a livable home.  We have needs and bills and we juggle and prioritize to get it all done.  So I ask myself, is the reason I don’t have a fortune because I haven’t learned and disciplined myself to an adequate level?  Would simplicity still call me?  Would I be hated by family and friends in a short period of time?  Most of all, could I be trusted to listen to my God for when, how and how much?

If I were to receive a windfall fortune, what would my life be in a year?  In the end, it is a trade.  Money is still only worth what you can trade it for.  The Bible exhorts us to trade if for incorruptible wealth.  And the questions remain.

Just thinking.